Skip to Accessibility Menu Skip to Login Skip to Content Skip to Footer
Need support now? Help is available. Call, text, or chat 988outbound call

Tell us about your symptom and treatment experience. Take our survey here.

Thought bubbles that contain various ways of self-care, from reading and taking a bath to crafting, watching movies, and talking to others

Illustrated by Esther Lui

Trying to Find Simple Pleasures With Postpartum Depression

Shay Smith's avatar image

By Shay Smith

Last Updated:

2 min read

Being a mother is one of the most fantastic feelings you can experience. On the flip side of that coin, though, motherhood is one of the most overwhelming experiences someone could have. I'm a mom of 5 and I wouldn't change that for anything in the world, but let me tell you, on the daily I feel overstimulated and overwhelmed by it.

Losing ourselves amid postpartum depression

I often find myself putting my own needs and wants on the back burner of life so that I can care for my family. I lose myself in the roles I play as wife and mother and often forget who I am outside of that. When I do have moments of downtime or time to myself, I usually sit there staring blankly at social media because I've forgotten what it is that I once enjoyed doing before having children.

By providing your email address, you are agreeing to our Privacy Policy and Terms of Use.

So eventually, I find myself trying to pour into others to take care of their needs when my cup is running low, and I just don't have much left in me to give. Then mommy has a meltdown, and everyone tiptoes around me for a couple days to make sure I'm not going to lose my mind on them.

Do you find that this happens to you? Do you give and give and give until there's nothing left? Do you feel the guilt for losing it because you really do love and care about everyone but just need a moment in your day to not be needed by anyone?

Finding simple pleasures to help cope

It's when I get like this that I force myself to slow down and take stock of the small things in life that give me even the smallest inkling of joy. I soak in the moments when my little ones stop what they are doing and tell me they love me, even if they are being little terrors simultaneously. I never deny my kids hugs and kisses when they ask for them because it helps trickle in some encouragement into my cup.

On top of that, I tend to try to take small moments in my day to do something just for myself. Something that I enjoy, and I know I will find rewarding. So, I charge you, dear reader, to try to start doing the same.

What brought you joy before kids?

Do you struggle to figure out what you enjoy doing just for yourself anymore? Have you so lost yourself in the roles you play that you're not sure who you are outside of them? Try thinking about some of the things you used to do before you had kids and try to find ways to engage in your interests again.

Go for a walk. Take a crafting class. Find a good book to read. Bake some cookies. Cook a healthy meal. Write a new blog post. Something, anything, that is just for you, just for the sake of enjoyment.

Finding your postpartum joy

You’re allowed to be a human being with interests and hobbies outside of your chosen roles in life. Don't let yourself get so wound up in giving yourself to others that you lose the spark of who you are.

And if you feel like it's already happened to you, then work on refilling your cup so that you can feel those small inklings of joy return to you. You're allowed. I promise.

This article represents the opinions, thoughts, and experiences of the author; none of this content has been paid for by any advertiser. The Postpartum.Mental-Health-Community.com team does not recommend or endorse any products or treatments discussed herein. Learn more about how we maintain editorial integrity here.