It's Okay to Cry

A couple feelings that I find often accompany my postpartum depression are those of guilt and shame. I tend to feel these things because I'll find myself getting caught up in the thought spiral of "I should've" rather than accepting what I can actually do.

I try to remember that I'm in the trenches right now with my children being so young still and that I can only manage so much. I try not to let the guilt or shame weigh my progress down while I'm coping with my symptoms.

Crying and postpartum depression

There are times, though, that you'll find that I've worked myself into a breakdown. Even though I know that I can only do the best I can my brain likes to poke at me and remind me of where I might be lacking. This often leads to crying jags that sometimes last days until I can break the spiral of thoughts.

You know what though? Crying is okay. It happens. It's our physical response to many different things and there is no shame in it. So, if you’re like me and find yourself worked up into a breakdown and can't seem to stop the crying, it's okay.

You are okay. You aren't stopping your progress just because you've had to have a cry. Remind yourself that you’re doing amazing things and that you'll be okay.

Tears can be cathartic

I find that crying is cathartic for me. Often once I've had a good cry (and gotten over the hangover that usually comes after), I find that I can usually handle a situation better.

Sometimes I need the physical release in order to see things more clearly. It’s like the tears flush out the negative thoughts, fears, worries, or anxieties and I can now focus a little more clearly on the good things.

Crying is normal

Your tears have purpose. Don't feel ashamed of them. Don't berate yourself for them. Embrace them for what they are. They are what you need in that moment in order to process your current circumstance or situation. The tears are perfectly normal.

Don't let shame push you further into a breakdown. Rather, allow yourself to feel the feelings associated with your tears and let the tears flush it out of your system. You can return to your regularly scheduled programming after a good cry.

Give yourself a timeout

Allow yourself to find a safe place to go to when you feel a breakdown coming. I often find myself in my bedroom or bathroom to have some time to myself to cry. Depending on the day and how the kids are behaving, I might take a hot shower and let the tears flow down and mingle with the water as it runs down my body. Or I might curl up into a ball on my bed to be comfortable and cry for a bit.

These are spaces I've come to allow myself to have so that I can feel safe to let the tears flow. I recommend that you allow yourself the same. If that means you need to put your little one in their crib with some toys to distract them for a minute so that you take some time for yourself then do so. Give yourself some grace and allow yourself this outlet.

Allow yourself to feel through the tears

You are doing just fine. You are allowed to cry. You are allowed to feel your feelings. Remember that you aren’t hurting your progress with your condition by allowing yourself to breakdown. It can be a healthy outlet for the emotions you are feeling. Allow yourself that.