Managing Your Own Mental Health In the NICU
The neonatal intensive care unit (NICU) is a hospital unit dedicated to babies who are born very early, known as "premature," or babies who need extra care. This care may include helping the baby breathe with a machine, giving medicine through an intravenous (IV) line, feeding through a feeding tube, and more. A NICU is staffed with doctors and nurses 24/7.1
Coping as a mom in the NICU
Having your baby admitted to the NICU can be very stressful and isolating. It can be easy to focus completely on your baby and forget about yourself. You may ignore your mental health, or notice that it is getting worse but not know where to find help. You also may find that it is difficult to bond with your baby. The uncertainty and new situation can lead to anxiety.1
Unfortunately, parents of NICU babies are more likely to experience depression, anxiety, or post-traumatic stress disorder (PTSD). But there are ways to help manage your mental health while your baby is in the NICU.2
This or That
Have you and your child experienced the NICU?
Getting involved with your baby's care
NICU babies are often in special bassinets or incubators to keep them warm. They may have IVs, wires, or tubes in place to help take care of them. This can feel overwhelming at first. You may feel afraid to hold your baby or participate in their care. But you often can still hold, comfort, and be involved with your baby.1
Skin-to-skin contact between mothers and babies has been shown to help the babies stabilize their temperature. It also helps reduce rates of postpartum depression in mothers.3
NICU nurses are trained in taking care of small or fragile babies. Ask them to help you hold or comfort your baby. They may also be able to help you change diapers, feed, and even bathe your baby. This can help you bond with your baby and relieve some of your sadness or anxiety.1
Expect changing needs
It is important to know that your needs may change throughout your baby's hospital stay. You will likely need time in the beginning to accept your new reality. It also can be difficult at first to keep up with the pace of the NICU.4
It may help to focus on getting to know and understand your care team (doctors, nurses, and specialists). Ask for written notes and an orientation to the NICU if you need them.4
If your baby requires a longer stay, you may find that you begin to settle into a routine. This may be a time where you connect and bond more easily with your baby.4
Impact on your mental health
As your baby gets closer to discharge, you may start feeling strong anxiety again. This can be a huge transition. It is an exciting time because your baby is nearly home. But it may be stressful to think about managing your baby's care all on your own. You may be leaving the support system you built in the NICU.4
It is important to know that this is normal. Be gentle with yourself and your changing needs. It is natural to feel a range of complex feelings as you are learning to adapt to your family's situation.4
Where NICU moms can get help
Anxiety, sadness, and stress are all common reactions when your child is admitted to the NICU. But you do not need to suffer alone. The hospital can connect you with social workers who can provide emotional support and resources. Your ob-gyn or primary care doctor can connect you with a therapist. They also may suggest medicines to help anxiety or depression symptoms.1
There are many resources you can look into on your own as well. For example, mindfulness techniques focus on staying present and understanding your feelings. These methods can be especially helpful when dealing with complicated emotions. Online or in-person support groups can offer a place to share your experiences with other NICU parents.1
You're doing all that you can
Remember, you are doing the best you can for your baby and your family. You did not cause your baby to be admitted to the NICU. Parenthood may look different while your baby is in the NICU, but there are still ways to care for your baby. Every NICU journey is different. Do not be afraid to seek support around you.2